In a series of posts, I am going to reflect upon what we can learn about leadership from David, King of Israel. If this is the first post in the series you have read, please do a quick review of the January 2, 2009 blog titled “David’s lessons on leadership – Intro”; that post outlines why I am looking into David’s life.
The previous blog dealt with going astray and why we should “Stay on Mission”. This post is a commentary on impact of the support of one person, the change that occurs in our lives and leadership journey when we have a “Jonathan Moment”.
Early in David’s journey to leadership he went through a very difficult moment. In that moment one friend, Jonathan stood with him and Jonathan’s allegiance led David to the next stage of his life.
Before I describe the moment, I need to give you the back-story. After David kills Goliath at the tender age of 17, Saul the king promoted him to a high rank in the army. David continued to serve Saul and lead troops into battle on Saul’s behalf. The people of Israel and Judah loved what David was doing and the rest of the army commanders also became impressed with his victories. In addition, David began a deep friendship with Jonathan, the son of Saul. Saul goes through a strange metamorphosis whereby all the admiration that lands on David starts to make Saul jealous. Saul started as a mentor to David and then makes several attempts to assassinate him.
The pivotal, difficult moment comes during the New Moon Festival or Rosh Chodesh, which was an important and visible ceremony for Saul. David is convinced Saul is trying to kill him and Jonathan is equally convinced that his father, Saul, would never kill David.
They devise a way to test Saul’s intent. David is to stay away from the feast and when Saul asks Jonathan about David, Jonathan is to say that David wanted to go to Bethlehem and be with his family. Jonathan would watch his father’s reaction and then come to a place where David is hiding and provide a secret signal. He told David, “I will shoot three arrows to the side of where you are hiding, as though I were shooting at a target. Then I will send a boy and say, 'Go, find the arrows.' If I say to him, 'Look, the arrows are on this side of you; bring them here,' then come, because, you are safe; there is no danger. But if I say to the boy, 'Look, the arrows are beyond you,' then you must go”
Well, Saul gets angry that David is not there and tells Jonathan that David must die. Jonathan heads out to where David is hiding and implements the plan. Jonathan sends the signal that lets David know that Saul means to kill him. As David gets up to leave all he has ever known, his friend Jonathan says to him, “Go in peace, for we have sworn friendship with each other…between you and me, and between your descendants and my descendants forever.”
This is a moment of deep despair for David. When he heard the words, “Isn’t the arrow beyond you?” he knew that his life was changed in a profound way. Everything he knew would be different. Where he lived, how he lived, what he did and who he walked with - all different and all a mystery at this moment in time. However, knowing Jonathan believed in him, David was able to move forward.
Each of us has moments in our lives when something happens and we know everything next will be different. Leading up to that moment, we may think about the change, we may plan for the change, but until it is there we are not really “all in”. Then it happens and the bridges burn behind us. It is that moment when it is so critical to have at least one person who believes in you. With just one person, you can move through life’s stages with confidence.
An example for me was a demanding moment at work on March 30th, 2003. It was the end of our fiscal year and everything crashed around my shoulders; I knew the next step would be difficult and different. At that moment I had one man, an ex-boss and mentor, write me a short note. I have kept it to this day. Here is what he wrote:
I stopped by this morning, but you were in the gym. Since you looked like you had just watched your puppy get run over last night, I wanted to check in on you this morning.
However, knowing you as well as I do, I know you have moved on to the New Year, and are walking with confidence and enthusiasm this morning. Your team will expect you to be mad and lack some confidence and conviction after a rough close to the year, and as usual I know you will surprise them, and they will draw strength from your example.
Watching you attack your job, and emerge as one of the true top sales leaders in our company this year, all while "Doing it Right", has inspired me. It hasn't surprised me, though. Nor is it the first time you have inspired me. Just wanted to drop you a note and make sure you weren't going to let two or three accounts, a war and an I/T slump have any impact on your confidence or your ability to lead. I'm not sure why I bothered.....I know you won't let that happen. You never have in the past.
Five years later this note still inspires me, it tells me at least one person believed in me in a really rough moment. I am not sure this person knows just how much they lifted me up at this moment. My ‘Jonathan’ arrived at the exact moment I needed him.
When Jonathan tells David, “Go in peace we have sworn friendship with each other”, he is giving David the incredible power of belief; the power one person receives when he or she knows there is at least one person who believes in them. Each of us needs to commit to being a Jonathan. Commit to taking a moment and letting the David’s in your life know you believe in them and are faithful to them. When you say these four words, “I believe in you”; you can change a person’s life and shepherd them through the most difficult moments they face.
Go - hand someone a “Jonathan Moment”.
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